When Teens Engage in Violence
Lite98, 1.25.12
Parent Talk
Liz Pearce
Hearing about teens fighting in school is distressing at best, and downright terrifying if your child attends the school. Rest assured, school leaders are equally concerned, but solutions do not come easily.
It’s difficult to pinpoint why teens are fighting – some research points to the amount of violent acts that children see on TV, the internet or their immediate environment. Additional research points to incidences of bullying or being teased. The Centers for Disease Control suggests teen violence is rooted in frustration due to learning disorders, emotional disturbance or attention deficits. Other researchers suggest violence is due to not knowing how to channel frustration. In reality, teen violence is usually a result of many of these factors, and not just one.
One thing we do know is that teens who dwell on violence, play out violent fantasies in their heads, and have access to weapons are more likely to engage in violence. Tactics that attempt to control the behavior of large groups, such as metal detectors, locker searches or the presence of uniformed policemen are short-term solutions. As a community, we MUST face this issue head on, and be responsible for raising our children in such a way that creates responsible, thoughtful and caring adults. There are actions we can take today that counteract violence – whether your child is the victim, the perpetrator, or a witness to teen violence.
If you are concerned about your teen, the following tips will strengthen your relationship and build resilience in teens.
- Listen to your teen and talk to him or her regularly
- Know where your teen goes, and who they go with
- Praise your teenager for jobs well done
- Set consistent rules and limits
- Model appropriate behavior for your teen
- Be involved with your teen's school.
- Make sure you show love and attention each day
- Practice anger management in the home, avoiding physical conflict and resolving differences through calm mediation
- Provide experience that allow your teen to contribute to the family
If you are concerned that your teen is the instigator of violent behavior, you CAN do something about it:
- Model tolerance in your home, and teach your child to respect others
- Get to know your teens friends, and if you suspect they instigate violence, get help from the school counselors office.
- Help and encourage your teen to find other ways to react to pressures and frustrations. Teach appropriate ways to channel negative emotions.
- Make sure that your teen understands the seriousness of violent behavior.
- Ask for help. Attend counseling sessions with your teen.
- Examine your home environment. Is your home a place of conflict? Does a parent or sibling tease or torment your teen? Finding ways to change the way things run at home can be a way to get help for teen violence.
Information compiled from: "Youth Violence: Fact Sheet," Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, National Center for Injury Prevention and Control [online]; “What You Need to Know About Youth Violence Prevention” Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, National Mental Information Center [online]; “Bullying and Your Child” Kids Health [onlin
